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Canadian Lifesaving Manual French - [PDF]
When you buy through these links, we may earn an affiliate commission. He can go from distraught to delighted in the space of a modifier. He combines Gary Larson’s irony, Bill Watterson’s wistful idealism, Oscar Wilde’s keen social observation, and Dorothy Parker’s mischievousness. But set in space. In short, he is a genre all to himself. Keep an eye on your inbox. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. And some said that even the trees had been a bad move, and that no one should ever have left the oceans. I mean, you may think it’s a long way down the road to the chemist’s, but that’s just peanuts to space.” Many people have speculated that if we knew exactly why the bowl of petunias had thought that we would know a lot more about the nature of the Universe than we do now. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man — for precisely the same reasons. To explain — since every piece of matter in the Universe is in some way affected by every other piece of matter in the Universe, it is in theory possible to extrapolate the whole of creation — every sun, every planet, their orbits, their composition and their economic and social history from, say, one small piece of fairy cake. The man who invented the Total Perspective Vortex did so basically in order to annoy his wife. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Therefore, there must be a finite number of inhabited worlds. Any finite number divided by infinity is as near to nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the Universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the whole Universe is also zero, and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely the products of a deranged imagination. Make it totally clear to anyone standing at the wrong end that things are going badly for them.
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If that means sticking all sort of spikes and prongs and blackened bits all over it then so be it. This is not a gun for hanging over the fireplace or sticking in the umbrella stand, it is a gun for going out and making people miserable with. To summarize the summary: anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. Creation holds its breath. Let me give you an example. Think of a number, any number.” “Er, five,” said the mattress. “Wrong,” said Marvin. “You see?” The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn’t an afterlife. So they would distinguish between thin snow and thick snow, light snow and heavy snow, sludgy snow, brittle snow, snow that came in flurries, snow that came in drifts, snow that came in on the bottom of your neighbor’s boots all over your nice clean igloo floor, the snows of winter, the snows of spring, the snows you remember from your childhood that were so much better than any of your modern snow, fine snow, feathery snow, hill snow, valley snow, snow that falls in the morning, snow that falls at night, snow that falls all of a sudden just when you were going out fishing, and snow that despite all your efforts to train them, the huskies have pissed on. Protect me from even knowing that there are things to know that I don’t know. Protect me from knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not to know about. Amen. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move. And, want even MORE towel stuff for Towel Day. There are moments where the budget has clearly benefited the overall experience, with some breath-taking CGI sequences.
Two particularly spring to mind: An impressive backwards zoom out from earth's surface, past the Vogon demolition charges before the planet is so hastily disposed of, and Arthur's journey onto Magrathea's staggeringly colossal factory floor, which is simply overwhelming. Both illustrate, to great satisfaction, the dramatic readjustment of scale Arthur Dent has to undergo in such a short space of time in a stark manner that is just not possible in any medium other than cinema. The on-screen format of the guide itself is an appropriate update of the format developed for the television series, and it's highly enjoyable to see such delightfully silly animations grace a giant cinema screen. Cinema is a different experience, and that is the nub of the matter. We are dealing with a radically different medium from any of the other that Hitchhiker's has materialised in, and not only does that offer new opportunities to explore Douglas Adams' marvellous universe, it also necessitates dramatic changes. Most noticeably, and perhaps most important for a two-hour motion picture, there is more effort to form a conventional plot than is present in the original incarnations and this change is accompanied by major changes in character motivation. This is interesting, because (here analysis becomes problematic since it is impossible to know which changes were instigated by Adams and which were down to Karey Kirkpatrick), none of the characters in Adams' earlier material really had any significant motivations that would lend them to becoming interesting protagonists in a more conventional setting. Previously, Narcissist Zaphod wanted his ego stroked by fame and fortune, Ford was content with the prospect of a decent party to go to and Arthur's only desire was a palatable cup of tea. Trillian didn't really do anything.
Although they are far from unrecognisable, the introduction of tangible drives into most of the characters alters the pattern of events in the story to accommodate what begins to resemble a more conventional story structure. One of the first casualties of this is that the principle players overshadow others, who are introduced, half-heartedly expanded upon, and then almost entirely dropped in deference to the favoured few. It never goes the whole way towards a standard structure though, as half of the principle story is seemingly abandoned in favour of a concentration on the romantic subplot and an overall resolution that is at least reverent to the previous formats. The result is a mixed bag. I found Arthur much more likable and Zaphod funnier than I ever have done, but it never actually occurred to me until the film that Arthur was a bit of a whinger and Zaphod quite boring, because I was too busy paying attention to what happened to them, rather than what they happened to do. The other major objection, which may or may not have been inevitable, given the time that must be given over to visuals in cinema, is that the filmmakers appear to try and get too much into a two-hour film. As a result, some brilliantly funny lines are missed and key explanations fudged and both are replaced by a general silliness, which appears to be a compromise between the demands of hardcore Hitchhiker's fans and those of the cinema-going public. A lot of the new material is funny, but some of it doesn't really fit with Adams' universe and sticks out like a sore thumb. Whether this is the consequence of those responsible being caught between the rock of Adam's inventiveness and the hard place of the medium they were working in is hard to say. Perhaps someone braver could have produced something more appropriate, or perhaps this is the best that there could ever be. I suppose we'll never know. To summarise: It's very different. Sign in to vote.
And how about the unnecessarily inflated love story between Arthur and Trillian? Good grief. Some other notable failures: 1) the very flat deliveries of some of the actors (Zooey Deschanel, Mos Def). I have to admit, I fell for it. Watch this movie and then go see the BBC version. If you still think getting whacked in the face after stepping on a rake is funny, or seeing someone slip on a banana peel leaves you in stitches, you'll probably like the movie version better. Sign in to vote.Trillian and Arthur end up in a love story, Zaphod's turned into a prick, the plot is changed a bit, and the inclusion of slapstick humour. Even some new characters where made by DNA for the movie. You need to remember that H2G2 in every version has contradicted itself. Each form is a different entity, so this movie should be regarded in that sense. I can see what they did.--- I personally don't like the movie much. I am a dyed in the wool fan of the books. To be fair, there are some things I do like in this. I think Zoe was exceptional as Trillian. I thought some of the visuals of the movie were brilliant. The greatness shows what COULD have been. A H2G2 movie could have been brilliant, but with the changes to the source; for fans of the original, it's average. The movie I feel was tailored to a new audience. The humour feels closer to American humour than British. I'm not sure if this was intended or not. The changes where made to make it a stand alone 2hr movie with enough 'normal points' to keep non-fans happy. I don't know if it worked. I don't know if new audiences, that had never read the books (or played the game, listened to the radio, or watched the TV series), will enjoy the humour. What really worries me is that people will see the movie, think it's terrible and than write off every other format. That would be the ultimate disgrace to DNA. Fans will find this from average to terrible. Everyone else I only pray they seek the source. Sign in to vote.
Like many others, I suspect, I was worried by the MJ Simpson negative review, but having seen the film I can't really understand what all the fuss was about. Personally, I am very happy that this version contains the new material. I don't want to sit in the cinema watching a line by line copy of the radio play, book, or TV series. Each of those stand by their own merit, and each were good largely because of the new material they contained. I think the cast did an excellent job, and although Zaphod wasn't quite how I pictured him, Sam Rockwell brought a freshness to the part which largely works. Ford is beautifully played, as are all the major characters. In summary, go to see this film and don't worry. I'm looking forward to the DVD and I have all my fingers crossed for a sequel. Martin Sign in to vote.It's very funny, very kooky and visually gorgeous. I saw it with about 2000 media persons and we all loved it, which is a pretty hard thing to accomplish. If you've never read the books (and I suggest you do, it moves at such a pace you might find yourself going 'eh?' a lot) then I don't know what you'd make of it. Think Monty Python in space, or a very British version of The Fifth Element. As an adaptation I think it works extremely well though there were a few confusing moments even for me as the large philosophical questions were crammed into two hours worth of movie. The new stuff is cleverly done and works a treat IMO. The cast: never been a fan of the office but Martin Freeman is perfect as Arthur Dent, Sam Rockwell hilariously OTT and Mos Def a surprising choice but one that really works. Trillian isn't that important in the novel and the movie bumps up her role to a love triangle situation between her Arthur and Zaphod. Again, Deschanel is an odd choice (another yank) but she is utterly spellbinding (oh the shower scene.hubba hubba). The FX are great, both CGI and the Jim Henson creatures (the Vogons, brilliantly voiced by The League of Gentleman).
The opening title song is worth the price of admission alone (think Eric Idle at his peak). So I loved it, though the ending is also a bit of an anti-climax, but only perhaps because I was expecting something bigger.Sign in to vote.Passing from the hands of one director to the next (James Cameron, Spike Jonze and Jay Roach), it wasn't until the idea landed in front of Garth Jennings and Nick Goldsmith that things truly started to take shape. Douglas Adams died from a heart attack in 2001, but after reading the books, watching the film and drawing a comparison, it's clear that Adams would've accepted this adaptation of the TV series of the computer game of the radio series wholeheartedly. Martin Freeman is an inspired choice as the face of Arthur Dent. He's an everyman, his slightly vacant, permanently confused facial expression (which we've all come to recognise from his role in The Office), truly becoming from a man who's trying to make sense of what's Out There, which happens to be similar to, though on a slightly larger scale than what's Down Here. And stupider. Admittedly, it would've been nice to see more English talent taking on the roles from Adams' well loved creation. Steven Fry is THE Guide, the quintessential voice of logic and good-humoured reasoning in the Universe. Bill Nighy makes a great Slartibartfast, coming across as the kindly, if a little absent minded, genius that I've always imagined. And Alan Rickman providing his nasal drones to Marvin the Paranoid Android worked to near perfection. That's not to say that the American cast isn't great. Mos Def and Zooey Deschanel are excellent as Ford Prefect and Trillian, but it's obvious that it's Sam Rockwell who's having all the fun, relishing his role as the over-excitable, reminiscently hippie-rockstar Ex-President of the Galaxy, Zaphod Beeblebrox. So all in all, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a great experience. Non-Adamites will love it, as will the die hard fans.
It's such a shame that its creator had to bow out before his beloved creation came to life, but due to his input into the movie script (the character Humma Kavula, played by John Malkovich, was written by him especially for the movie), his enthusiasm still lives on. Want to go to the Restaurant at the End of the Universe now, please. Sign in to vote.Good Points The effects were quite impressive. - Stephen Fry's interludes where he narrates parts of the Hitchhikers Guide were the most amusing parts. Bad Points The pacing of the film was terrible with parts where it was moving too fast to comprehend what was happening, to others where I was extremely bored and contemplating walking out of the movie. The characters had no depth and I didn't develop any feeling towards them at all. A very convoluted story which brushed over or dispensed with significant parts in the book far too often for seemingly little gain. Apart from the narrations from the HHGG the humour in the film seemed almost nonexistent. A mouse saying 'bollocks' got the biggest laugh in the cinema I was in, which says it all really. Not the sort of humour the author of the book was aiming at I would have thought. Overall A big disappointment, I had expected so much more (but should, perhaps, have known better). Sign in to vote.Fans rushed to their nearest webring to console each other when they discovered the bum-clenchingly great scripting responsibilities had been passed on to Karey Kirkpatrick, the brains behind fluffy kiddie flick, Chicken Run. A galaxy of stars were enlisted to bring the mind-boggling story to the big screen, including Martin Freeman, who reprises his superb Everyman role from The Office to play Arthur Dent, a tea-loving Londoner who becomes the last man from Earth, following its destruction to make way for a hyperspace bypass.
Mos Def proves not all hip-hop stars are fist-gnawingly embarrassing as actors, in his part as Ford Prefect, a revoltingly cool alien who accompanies Dent on his hitchhiking adventure around the universe. The unspeakably delicious Zooey Deschanel provides the love story that was sadly lacking in Adams' script drafts. She plays Trillian, the last surviving humanoid female, who finds herself caught in an unsavoury love triangle between Dent and Zaphod Beeblebrox, the President of the Imperial Galactic Government and owner of three arms, two heads and one planet-sized ego. And if you've ever wondered what Freddie Mercury and George Bush's lovechild would be like (and frankly, who hasn't?) watch Sam Rockwell's extraordinary portrayal of Beeblebrox. Who better to voice The Guide, a book which contains all the knowledge in the universe, than bulging-brained Fry, who uses the perfect amount of middle-class haughtiness, irony and intelligence to narrate the delightfully complicated story. And Nighy can't fail as planet builder Slartibartfast (who, as every nerd knows, won an award for creating the twiddly bits around Norwegian fjords) because he based the world-weary alien on the nation's best-loved character, Bill Nighy. I almost missed out one character, insane religious leader Humma Kammula, a new character Adams wrote especially for John Malkovich. He is easily forgotten because despite his amusing dialogue, the special effects drown out his performance, preventing him from doing the honour justice. But fans will forgive this small transgression, for the pleasure of seeing a beast of a movie which has defied the laws of the universe to make it onto the big screen. Jennings and Goldsmith have proved that despite their movie virginity, the first time isn't always messy, awkward and disappointing, it can also be earth shattering, amusing and very, very satisfying. Sign in to vote.I've never walked out on a movie before- not even Battlefield Earth.
That said- perhaps I should explain myself: Douglas Adams was a master at writing short and witty dialog- so the obvious thing to do in a movie adaptation is to throw it all out and replace it with. nothing. Scenes have been added and other scenes thrown out but in the end- the movie just is not funny. The seemingly random plot of the book is just plain senseless in the movie. Throughout the movie I just kept asking myself why certain scenes were changed and lines removed. If it made sense to advance a movie plot- fine. These changes though were just completely random. Is this funnier? Does it make more sense. Does it advance the plot in some way. NO. Worse still- the scene in which the construction foreman explains to Arthur that the plans have been on display and he should have filed his grievance earlier. Why? There are so many more things wrong with this movie I can't begin to list them all. I completely understand that Douglas Adams use to change the story with each new adaptation but they all had one thing in common- they were funny. This movie is simply awful. The only redeeming parts are Marvin (who although he looks stupid is at least sort of funny), the guide itself, and the yarn characters. Please do yourself the favor and do not bother to see it. Or if you do go to see it at least expect a movie even worse than Battlefield Earth. Sign in to vote.I'm not really a fan of film reviewers as their job involves pretending that there is an objective standard that governs how much everyone will enjoy a film (well, some of them are smart enough not to dress their opinion as anything else). Everyone enjoys films in different ways and I like to use my own judgment to decide if a film is worth my time or not (well, that and the opinions of a few trusted individuals who's taste in films is very similar to my own). So this isn't a review, it's just my honest reaction to the film and you may judge for yourselves if my opinion is likely to be similar to your own.
I loved it. There were a couple of small points that I wasn't happy with but there was so much that I really enjoyed that I left the cinema very happy indeed. It has a very frantic pace, especially when compared to the glacial pace of the TV series. But, in my opinion, it works. I'll now talk about different aspects of the film. The Cast. Each member of the cast has brought a new interpretation of their character to the film but they are still definitely the same characters. Martin Freeman is very funny but also very human. He's less of a caricature of Britishness than Simon Jones's interpretation. Mos Def is an excellent laid back Ford who occasionally has slightly manic (David Dixon style) moments. I don't think everyone will like his delivery of some of the lines as he can be very dead-pan at times but I found him very watchable and likable. Sam Rockwell's Zaphod is either lovable or irritating depending on your loony-tolerance. I found his over-the-top performance was just perfect for Zaphod, and frequently had me in stitches. Zooey Deschanel. Mmmm.Zooey. She's the best Trillian ever. She's adorable, funny, charming, intelligent and finally has an emotional depth that was missing from all other incarnations. She works well with both Zaphod and Arthur and their interactions were believable. Bill Nighy gave a performance that managed to be nothing like Richard Vernon's yet at the same time definitely Slartibartfast. Very funny. Very human. Stephen Fry is someone who I new would be good. He has the intelligence needed to get the delivery right and a mysterious gentle voice (like God has popped round for a cup of tea). The Effects, sets and puppets. Wonderful. I loved the Vogon puppets, it made them seem much more real than any CG character (yes, even Gollum). The sets looked great and there is one nice tracking shot down a Vogon corridor that shows just how huge the set was. Every set is packed with detail, I cannot wait for the DVD.
The Magrathea 'factory floor' is breathtaking - especially on the big-screen. Zaphod's second head isn't brilliantly executed but it didn't bother me much. The Guide entries. I'm a big Shynola fan. I was extremely excited when I learned that they would be doing the guide entries. I wasn't disappointed - the guide entries look great and are packed with the inventive wit that characterises Shynola's work. The way they visually interpret the words of the guide entries is very clever and matches the wit of the original animations in the TV series but with a more modern approach. The Music. The Dolphin song at the start was wonderful. Call me a softy but a couple of the lines nearly brought a tear to my eye. The music for the guide entries fit really well. The new orchestrated version of Journey of the Sorcerer is great. I was too wrapped up in the experience to really notice the music, I'll have to see it again (or buy the soundtrack)! Editing. The film flies along at an incredible pace but for me it never suffered from the 'why are we here now?' problem that some film (The Phantom Menace) suffer from. I really couldn't tell you how someone new to Hitchhiker's Guide might react. The destruction of the Earth is particularly well handled, managing to be both funny and moving. Stuff I didn't like. Not much really. Part of me craves for the inclusion of things that other parts of me recognise will make the film less effective. One thing that I felt was a shame is that certain added plot elements make the story less bleak. These plot elements actually come from later books in the series so they weren't un-Hitchhiker-y but they contributed to a more optimistic story than I am familiar with from other versions. But this is a minor quibble and it didn't spoil my enjoyment of the film. Though I really liked Zaphod, I didn't really like the second head. It didn't work as well as it might have.
Still, it was preferable to a shoulder-mounted permanent extra head - which would have been wrong for many reasons. Conclusion. It is The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy reborn with a new energy. It is lighter than previous incarnations but still retains most of what I love about the story. It also adds a brilliant level of visual inventiveness that matches the aural inventiveness of the original radio series. People expecting the TV series but with better effects will be disappointed. This is a new beginning. The Hitchhiker's Guide is alive again, it is an enormous shame on a galactic scale that Douglas isn't here to enjoy it. The huge applause after the film showed I wasn't alone in having a good time. Also, the film contains my favourite line. It previously only occurs in the second radio series (as far as I know) and is moved to a different occasion but I was dead chuffed when I heard it! Sign in to vote.Fast forward several years (or decades - I don't remember) and I have just walked out of the British premiere of the new movie in Leeds (a first for me). Lacking any of the subtlety of Adam's humor that made the radio shows and book so popular in the 80's and acted as badly, if not worse than the TV series, this movie is a horror. This movie is lazy, sloppy, badly shot, and grainy - looks like it was shot on digicam. I cannot really think who could have pulled off a movie of HHG maybe Terry Gilliam, The only saving grace is a cameo by the original Marvin from the BBC series. Truly awful. I don't know why I bother Oh my God - Funny, how just when you think life can't possibly get any worse it suddenly does. Sign in to vote.As a long-time fan of Adams and of the BBC radio and the television version, I was crushed. I actually fell asleep. I watched it again afterwards, still shocked. The acting was insipid and unbelievable (and that in an epic space fantasy!). Zaphod was way overplayed and unbelievable and the two heads and three arms were just plain wrong.
One head could not talk to the other. Who is Ford? Why is he named Ford. Why is he black? Why does he run to Arthur's house with a grocery cart full of beer and peanuts. There is so little motivation in this film for anything. Why is there an entire construction company and 25 men. It was just a little house. Besides, they cut out the dialogue about finding the plans, the basement, the disused lavatory, and the leopard. So, why bother with all the props. Marvin is short and moves quickly and often. This is not in keeping with the character. The great Warwick Davis deserves better. What a waste of the adorable Zooey. She wants to go to with Arthur. Why? And why would she desire him anyway. BTW, they met at a 'fancy dress' ball. This, uh, doesn't mean weird costumes. Characters drift in and out of continuity. The planet Magrathea is pronounced variously as magra-THAY-uh and magra-THEE-uh. The excellent narrator does his best to hold things together, but he's no Peter Jones alas, and he's not given the chance actually. What's this 'dolphins with musical bit' for the beginning. That's not the beginning anyway. These folks should've followed Douglas Adams -- who wrote the story for radio. They were working with output from a man who had a tremendous, albeit unusual, understanding of how to tell a story -- the sequences being especially important to his style. And this story is nothing if not style. The end seemed to tease us about the restaurant at the end of the universe and then confuse us about at which end it was located. Good grief! It's the end of the universe in time, not location.Sign in to vote.Having grown up with the TV series, the radio series, and the books (in that order), I have certain preconceptions and expectations about Hitchhiker's that this film didn't always deliver. Mos Def was just wrong as Ford Prefect - too American, too trendy.
Zooey Deschanel was the perfect Trillian - you can believe this girl is an astrophysicist (although the line which tells you that is cut). Sam Rockwell as Zaphod. No! He was really irritating me right from his first appearance although by the time Ford was squeezing lemons into his brain to make him think the character got funnier. The two heads are hopeless but perhaps an improvement on a shoulder-mounted rubber one. Others are very good in smaller parts - Bill Nighy as Slartibartfast, John Malkovich as new character Humma Kavula, Steve Pemberton as Mr Prosser, and of course the voice-only talent (Bill Bailey, Helen Mirren, Alan Rickman, and Stephen Fry as the Book). What I missed the most were favourite lines - the whole 'Beware of the Leopard' sequence from the beginning between Arthur Dent and Mr Prosser; the 'Please enjoy your trip through this door' perky personality doors on the Heart of Gold; the 'turning into a penguin' and 'monkeys writing Hamlet' sequence; and the 'trouble with my lifestyle' section on Magrathea. To make up for it the special effects are very good and there are lots of new creatures such as the jewel encrusted crab and the tiny running robot. The Vogons look good as well. The film itself has a happy ending which is at odds with the book and all other adaptations - it also ends at a different point to both radio and TV series, just as the characters are off to the Restaurant at the End of the Universe. Does this mean there will be sequels? Sign in to vote.Not funny in the least. Even the production design is a disappointment, and what happened to the Guide itself. The Guide sequences were the most hilarious bits of the original books as well as the original BBC radio serial and later miniseries. Save your time and money and get the DVD of the original BBC miniseries from the early '80s.
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